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No matter how bad you’ve got it
Posted on | February 21, 2008 | 9 Comments
someone else always has it worse.
I rode up in the elevator, 30 minutes late to work, with an attorney from another firm. Small talk commenced, she said it would’ve been a perfect day to call in sick (it’s gray and raining) and I said yes, particularly since I have a sore throat, but I’d been out a lot taking care of my family so far this year and really can’t afford the day for myself. She said she’d had the flu three weeks ago, the flat on your back, think you’re gonna die flu, and only managed to take one day off to recuperate. I made some lame comment about how unfair that was, how I didn’t recall signing up to be the caretaker of everyone. (grouchy, much?)
She said that her mom came to visit recently and got very angry at her situation. She has four children and her husband is a stay at home dad. She holds down a full time job and apparently takes a lot of work home with her because she was toting an overly full file box. She’s also responsible for making the kids do their homework and doing all the laundry and housework. She said it’s easier to do it all herself than fight about it getting done, or not getting done. She admitted to being a perfectionist and not wanting her kids to go off to school in mismatched clothes; I told her she needed to let go of that, it’s not that important.
The elevator reached my floor and we both went on to start our days. My mood was considerably lightened. I wish I could say the same for her.
Comments
9 Responses to “No matter how bad you’ve got it”
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February 21st, 2008 @ 9:52 am
Oh poor woman! Some people really do have issue and problems. Smith looks like a prince compared to her hubbo! LOL
February 21st, 2008 @ 9:54 am
Huh. I used to work with a woman who made the whole family get up at 3am because she had to be the one to pick out the kids’ clothes, brush their hair and make their breakfast, and she had to be at work at 6am. (Well, that was her choice too.) I would not have married a guy if I didn’t think he could manage to dress and feed a child without my help (though I think she picked out her husband’s clothes too).
February 21st, 2008 @ 9:57 am
PS – I don’t have sympathy much sympathy for that attorney. If she’s working, she either needs to let go of her perfectionism or pay someone to do the housework, and send the laundry out if she can’t trust her husband to do it “her way”. I don’t always like what the DH cooks, but at least he’s cooking, so I shut the hell up and eat it. :-)
February 21st, 2008 @ 10:45 am
What exactly does the stay at home dad do? If he’s working from home I vote for them hiring a housekeeper, if not, why isn’t he in charge of the housekeeping, laundry and homework? Not to point the finger at the attorney but I think the key word may have been perfectionist.
February 21st, 2008 @ 11:54 am
Yes, I keep having those experiences around work. I feel so very lucky, despite any perceived problems.
February 21st, 2008 @ 2:02 pm
Life IS largely what you make it, eh?
February 21st, 2008 @ 3:04 pm
While she may or may not be a perfectionist, she most definitely is a martyr. You can’t be a control freak (matching clothes) and whine about it later. Besides, there wouldn’t be an argument in my house if those were my circumstances…he’d be gone.
February 21st, 2008 @ 9:50 pm
Good lord — who even discloses that kind of information in an elevator??
I’m kind of feeling for her stay-at-home-husband – she clearly thinks he’s useless and if he is that useless why keep him? To stay miserable?
Eek.
February 24th, 2008 @ 3:46 pm
Hmmm. It’s probably not fair to judge someone by what they choose to disclose on the elevator, but it seems to me that lady may have some problems. Perfectionism doesn’t fit well into what she has chosen for her life’s work.